Dear Accident Prone Man Who Mistakenly Dropped His Empty Cigarette Box Out Of His Car Window,

You are reunited!! No need to thank me, knowing you two are together again is all the thanks I’ll ever need. Well, that and keeping downtown free of litter.

All the best,

-Sam

Dear Bicycler Taking & Then Editing A Selfie In The Bus Lane,

I agree. There should be more personal entertainment while doing the most dangerous thing you’ll do all day. It’s time for surgeon selfies!!
All the best,

-Sam

Dear My 9 Year Old Twin Nephews,

Whereas I totally dig your creativity and design of your Greek Myths trading cards and I’m also a big fan of the store, I’m totally calling bullsh*t on TJ Maxx being Zeus’ little known brother.
All the best, -Uncle Sam

Dear French Open Cameramen,

We all understand that you take a more “artistic” approach than other sports cinematographers, but you crossed the line here into perversion.
All the best,

-Sam